Finnish metalcore band PORTRAITS (members of Cleansing, Baron) have refined their sound of classic metalcore in the likes of Killswitch Engage, As I Lay Dying and Trivium, drawing from the base of heavy riffs and big, memorable choruses. Originally formed in 2011, the band members have spent their youth writing and playing music together in the form of multiple lesser releases and shows, until eventually regrouping under a new name to finish off writing their debut full-length.
After two years of composing new material, revisiting unused songs or ideas from the past, and everlasting studio sessions spread-out the summer of 2019 combined with music video shoots, At My Darkest, the album the band had always desired to make, was finished. The first single Hands of Guilt was released on the 29th of July with a music video, setting the tone for the upcoming full-length and the new direction for the band.
At My Darkest forms a tale of forgiveness, consisting of stories spread throughout a journey of self-awareness and guilt. When the only escape seems to lie somewhere deep within, you start to shape your reflection in a new manner. Realising you cannot cast aside your darker self, you’re forced to accept this co-existence and begin the struggle towards peace as equals. Learning to forgive, crawling towards a place you can call your own. – Mark My Words Records
Portraitsβ debut album was released 22nd of September through Mark My Words Records accompanied by the preceding singles and a music video for the song Haze. Acting as the ending track of the album, Haze is the pinnacle of the story and is the most heartfelt set of lyrics; intended to remain open to the listenerβs personal interpretation.
The concept for most of the songs and/or for the album as a whole was present even before the lyrics or the title were complete, therefore leading the final process. As the title settled in, the album began to shape up as more of a journey rather than a collection of songs. The tracks fell into their places on the album and the thoughts behind the songs turned into a coherent story.
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Dive into each and every track of this outstanding record through the track by track commentary below.
Mortal Frame
And after this life of shame
I wonder if I couldβve changed
I sit back and rethink every choice I ever madeAll the smiles I choked
All the pain I kept for myself
The mess of a man I had
somehow becomeAnd it wasnβt all just for myself
Iβm so sorry for you
Iβm so sorry for the others
Who were hurt as I was lost in the pines
And Iβve never been so lost
So, as the silhouettes break
And the shadows turn into shades
All that is left is this broken heart
only I could have savedThis is a tale of forgiveness
This is my mortal frame
This is me at my darkest
Cleansing
Falling down
But whatβs the reason in living like this?
To a point where we have lost ourselves
Weβre all blind, fragile minds
A pack where no one survivesI am still searching for something new
I am still searching but it keeps holding me,
breaking me, pushing me against my heartAre we forgotten on the burnt feathers of our wings?
Has this ignition been all down for nothing?
Washing away our legacy
Ending all suffering
This is the cleansingAnd everything youβll ever want it to be
This is the cleansingThe storm is closing in
And our fates are to be sealed
But my mind wonβt settle down
While Iβm able to go onThis is the cleansing
And everything youβll ever want it to be
This is the cleansing
Parasite In Me
What has become of me
On my path I based on lies and greed?
When did I lose the pain
That once left me in shame?
A new direction, a new way out for me
I feel my shadow being torn
As my dark heart swallows it wholeWill I learn to forgive
Or am I stuck with all the blame?
Disguised
Will I learn to forgive
Or am I stuck with all the blame?
It will never be the same
InsideShow me what I have done
Iβll try to make it right
βCause Iβve lost myself, will I ever be complete?
I know what Iβll have to be
And let go of this curse in me
βCause Iβve lost myself, will it ever be the same?Casting aside this burden of mine
Towards a brighter path and clarity, is there still more
time?
To break free from everything, to lose this burning
sight?
To feel something that might be real?
I must begin, the end is nighIβm feeling numb again
Will it ever be the same?
Disguised
Dead inside
It will never be the same
Hands of Guilt
Once more I shatter the pines
Ripping my wounds open wide
It all piles down to a sickening sight
Another wasted lifeAnd it all just piles down
I never knew
What it could do
This is the darkest blightI see the end
And itβs calling me again
I canβt take the guilt
How can I escape?
I see the end
And itβs calling me again
βCause thereβs nothing left
But my final breath
This has to be the end
I hope you burn
As Iβm strangled from the hurtAnd with these hands of guilt
I sink into the depths
Of my darkest self
And with nothing else to give
These hands are ought to break
Leaving me in tears
As I fade away
We all suffer the sameBleeding from within
Separating things I cannot feel
Bleeding from within
My true form is revealed
Disbelief
Broken & smashed into pieces
How did this all become pointless?
My life, the one that Iβve chosen
Fades away, turns to dust
I seek & seek for these answers
To finally see my true colours
My life, the one that Iβve chosen
Fades away, turns to dustBut I will never let this change who I am
This is the place where I lost my ways
But I will never let this change who I am
Itβs time for me to make my peaceβCrawl through it all
Youβll live – just donβt give inβ
Iβve been seeking the key in disbelief
These signs pointing me towards the light
I crawl, does this even matter at all?
I cannot do this anymoreCrawling slowly through it all
I cannot do this anymore
So what the fuck should I do?Crawling through it all
Does this even matter at all?
Crawling through it all
I gave up hope
Mist
In the mist I see your vague face
I choke on the pain of my mistakes
No hope left for me in this placeIn the mist I see your vague face
I wave goodbye as I fall from grace
No hope left for me in this placeThe choice is placed into severed minds
And the distance between us
Keeps on growing even longer than I thought
Destination of this tale is yet to be defined
As my search for a purpose still carries on
Without a guide
Graven Image
Itβs written on the walls
Itβs written on the walls
My frail destiny callsIβve fallen yet again, and turned it all dark
Choked down the flame I held
So I could be set free
But can I reach the end in time to make this last
When nothing has ever stuck on my grasp?The silence overwhelms me
Inside my head Iβm torn
Torn asunder while hoping to meet my kin
Forever, unspoken
From this I cannot heal
But still trying to progress
And finally seeWhat itβs like to feel alive
It is written on the wallsI see it all from above
And Iβve never felt like this
Is it the end for me or have I started to heal?As above, so below
Written on the wallsThereβs still a bleeding that I need to somehow kill
Gasping out for air as Iβm falling to my knees
But can I reach the end in time to make this last
While being haunted by the portraits of my past?
At My Darkest
As I begin to thrive
in the cloud of forgiveness
Itβs sharply stripped down
to a pile of nothingnessAnd how can I find solace
When everything has turned upside down?
I canβt help but to compare this to my past
All I know has become a black mass
Falling to my rest
Nothingβs like it used to beBut I keep holding on
Iβm on my knees
Take it all away from me
But I keep holding on
And now I have a place to call my ownWhat did I learn from this?
Within myself Iβm completeAnd with clear conciousness
There comes a time
A time to feel like you just donβt belong
To be something youβre not supposed to be
And to feel alive
And I know Iβm alive
Falling to my rest
Nothingβs like it used to beAnd I keep holding on
Iβve found my peace
It wonβt slip away from me
And I keep holding on
And now I have a place to call my own
Haze
I roam inside these thoughts I found
That shouldnβt have ever seen the light
Iβm drowning, my lungs are caving in
Reach out and pull me out againPouring my shadow into these words I lead
As if they were ever mine to keep
Bound to these winds, I come to see
All of this is turning into a memorySomething calls me with a voice I canβt resist
Rearranging my thoughts to lonesome bits
False idols, hollow names, all meant for something elseIn the mist I see your vague face
I choke on the pain of my mistakes
Thereβs no hope left for me in this place
As your eyes disappear to the hazeIn the mist I see your vague face
I wave goodbye as I fall from grace
Thereβs no hope left for me in this place
As your eyes disappear to the hazeThis guilt has buried me
To a state of malcontent
But can I be healed?
Even if I try, nothingβs enoughThe choice is placed into severed minds
And the distance between us
Keeps on growing even longer than I thought
Destination of this tale is yet to be defined
As my search for a purpose still carries on
Without a guide