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Top 5 worst movies of all time, as seen by noisy post punk trio A VERY SPECIAL EPISODE

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Brooklyn’s noisy post punk act A VERY SPECIAL EPISODE just released their new album “Fix Your Hearts Or Die“, and to celebrate we have teamed up with them to give you their critical, tongue-in-cheek list of the worst movies of all time. No mercy. Prepare your favorite flicks to be brutally dissed.

“Brooklyn’s A Very Special Episode is one of the best live bands you’ll ever have the privilege of seeing.” – says the band’s label Hidden Home Records. “They are energetic, loud as fuck, and work so, so well as a three-piece unit. Fix Your Hearts Or Die is the perfect record to showcase their live sound and their creative genius. Get on the train now, or you’re missing out.”

“Described by the band as a record centered on self-reflection and introspection, Fix Your Hearts Or Die sees the trio unleashing their adventurous sound with little restraint, piecing together a series of songs with noise vignettes and sonic interludes shaped by feeling.” – continues Look At My Records.

“Though the band had written and performed these songs live many times prior to the pandemic, the halt in production stemming from COVID lockdown allowed them to make further tweaks to the finished product. The resulting 11 songs are a journey that ebbs and flows in intensity and morphs stylistically.”

As per New Noise Records, “The band cite influences like Sonic Youth, Japanese Breakfast, and The Royal They, existing somewhere between a bombastic, electricity-infused energy of shredding guitar and lighting the drum set on fire and a more subdued, ”I can’t go out tonight, I’m journaling” vibe.”

“Ultimately, the band invites returning listeners and new arrivals alike to check out the album and absorb it in whatever way best resonates, whether they relate more to the music itself, or the lyrics and themes explored within the 11 tracks.”

A Very Special Episode band

Top 5 Worst Films of All Time, according to AVSE:

The Matrix (1999)

Too long. I didn’t get it. Was it a movie about Duracell batteries? If I see another movie with cliché, overdone, slow motion gun action I’m gonna jab a phone line through the back of my head. I don’t even know why Keanu was fighting with anyone, his dog didn’t die in this one. Preferred the sequel. 2/10.

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2000)

No tigers. No dragons. Another film poisoned by false advertising. As far as Ang Lee flicks go, this is bottom tier. Check out Hulk (2003) for a real glimpse at this auteur’s capabilities. Fighting was decent. 4/10.

Ex Machina (2014)

The first ten minutes of the film had no talking so I thought my TV was broken and brought it back to Best Buy to return it but the guy there said I was outside of my return window and that I could send it in to possibly be looked at for repairs so I did that and it’s been two weeks and I haven’t been able to watch ANYTHING! Thanks a lot, Ex Machina! 3/10.

Goodfellas (1990)

More like, BAD MOVIE…Fellas. Most ancient film on the list, by design. (No good movies were made before Nirvana was a band, would not have been possible to write this concise list.) Bunch of old guys trying to solve their problems by cutting corners and sweeping things under the rug, or in this case ruining a perfectly NICE rug (which really tied the room together) by wrapping a dead body up in it. Totally irresponsible and a terrible influence. 2/10.

Toy Story (1995)

This movie would absolutely never happen in real life. These toys coming to life in this insane supernatural way totally took me out of the film. I went home and tried to sneak up on my toys for weeks until giving up on not only owning toys but my own youth in general. This film has the potential to take the magic out of kids’ hearts for years to come. That said, Tim Allen’s best work until Wild Hogs (2007) with the exception of the cinematic masterpiece that is Jungle 2 Jungle (1997). 1/10.

Bonus: Best Film of All Time According to AVSE:

Trolls World Tour (2020)

It was actually pretty good! 9/10.

Karol Kamiński

DIY rock music enthusiast and web-zine publisher from Warsaw, Poland. Supporting DIY ethics, local artists and promoting hardcore punk, rock, post rock and alternative music of all kinds via IDIOTEQ online channels.
Contact via [email protected]

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